Monday, May 31, 2010

About bad days, ploting and stuff you won't find in the evening news.

Everywhere you look there is a plot waiting to be discovered: that skin-chilling article in the paper, the car that sped at the red light, the happy family arguing right in front of the coco puffs in the cereal’s row at the supermarket. In our everyday life, even on this wonderful holiday. Even in our own office. Even us.
We could be our next best character yet and we don’t know.
Allow me to elaborate.
And now, I don’t write thrillers or crime or mystery. I like to think of myself as an aspiring YA fantasy writer. But man! Maybe a YA thriller could be interesting?
This distinction made, let’s just go ahead and describe my wonderful  (I have no words here to express it, not even with irony) Memorial Day, shall we?

First of all, God dang it! I have to work, cos’ I’ve escaped the claws of waitressing finding myself a good job in my specialty (marketing), but oh my! The place is open 362 days of the year. And we work holidays, *curses under her breath* and get some extra personal days, to take whenever.
Of course many took a personal day, but not me cos’ I’m brand new and still don’t have any *mutters ‘I should have call in sick’*. To make the numbers clear for ya, out of twenty directors and managers only five upper management (I really hate the word upper and don’t get me started on management!) representatives are in the office, this are the experts actually responsible for all the other fifty souls working and the potential thousand visitors. Among these visitors at least sixty five percent are children under the age of eight. And I am one of the upper. Great.
On a regular basis I am pretty proud of my job.
On a day like today, I just hate that I have to be here.
I get in at 9am. By 9.01 I wanted to get out. But hey! No, wait! You are responsible for the rest of the world in here, so let’s discuss our strategy and check the procedures.
I’m never going to understand the sick twisted mind behind a bomb threat. A bomb threat to a children’s facility, well, it’s like someone is trying to teach Latin to an iguana. Incomprehensible.
There’s a bit of commotion and thank goodness I don’t have to be running the show, because there’s and upper upper me, so I’m good collaborating with the police and following orders.
Relieve washes our exhausted faces, like huge waves in the Australian shore, when we realize it was all a prank, an hoax.
But unfortunately, but then the place is closed, we lost business and worst of all a lot of kids had to get back in their cars, sobbing over all the fun they are not going to have cos’ some big asshole (please excuse my French) decided to play terrorist!
Good news is no one got hurt. Good news is we had the steel to control the situation. The phrase ‘better be safe than sorry’ never, ever had the weight that it had this morning.
I just wish the police find the prick, and I wish so fervently this were a situation in a book, where the kids go all James Patterson over this villain.
I so would love that.


  1. I think we should reinstate the stocks, so that people who do jerkwad things like call in bomb threats get put in stocks outside the places they inconvenienced with their stupidity, and folk going in and out can throw rotten fruit (or frozen fruit... whichever) at them. It'd do a lot for deterrence, methinks.

  2. I agree Simon, I was so mad Monday. Thank goodness I'm better today. Still the frozen fruit is such a great idea!